Here you go:
If a tree falls in a forest, and kills a Muslim, does anyone care?
Q: Why is there so much food at a Muslim wedding?
A: To keep the flies off the bride.
Q: Whats the difference between a pile of dead Muslims and a pile of rocks?
A: You can’t move a pile of rocks with a pitch fork.
Many of my readers may not know, but natural disasters were responsible for the deaths of hundreds of thousands of Muslims last year. And more importantly, my wife chipped a fingernail this morning.
Q: Wanna hear a joke?
A: Muslim Women’s Rights.
In the recent earthquake in Pakistan rescuers recovered 10,000 bodies and tomorrow they are going into the second house.
Q: In an apartment building in London, Ahmed lives on the first floor, Mustafa on the second floor and Harry on the third floor. The building explodes – who lives?
A: Harry of course – he was at work.
Q: A Pakistani, a Turk, and a Moroccan are riding through Germany – who’s driving?
A: A police officer.
A Muslim Dies And Goes Up To Heaven
A Muslim dies and goes up to heaven. He’s stopped at the Pearly Gates by Saint Peter who says “Sorry, but we don’t allow Muslims into Heaven!”
“What?” replies the Muslim, “Why not?”
“Well, we just don’t!”
The Muslim complains and carries on until Saint Peter gets fed up, “Well,” says Saint Peter, “have you ever done anything good in you life?”
“Erm …” the Muslim replies, “yeah, just the other day a lady stopped me on the street collecting for a children’s charity so I gave her ten dollars. Then last week I also donated ten dollars to the American Cancer Society. Plus a couple of weeks ago a tramp asked me if I could spare any money so I gave him ten dollars too!”
“Alrighty then,” says Saint Peter, “let me go and have a quick word with God.”
Five minutes later Saint Peter returns and says to the Muslim, “Listen, I’ve spoken with God and He agrees with me – here’s your 30 bucks back, now screw off!”
The Mindset 