Who is a Muslim – a very funny definition
Posted by The Mindset on May 25, 2014
Here is very funny definition of ‘Muslim’ taken from Urban Dictionary
Muslims are people that live in the middle east. It is very easy to spot a Muslim because they have a towel on their head. One reason Muslims wear a rag on their head is because that’s a good place to carry explosives.
All muslims are loony tunes, not surprising because they watch cartoons like Tom & Jerry over and over for hours on end, taking time out to pray 5 times a day.
Muslims smell bad because they never take a bath. Muslims have camels, this leads to them being called Camel Jockeys. Camels smell almost as bad as muslims. No one is sure what Muslims eats to survive. No one is sure what a camel eats to survive.
Very easy to remember a Muslims name, because they are all named Mohammad, muslims don’t like to put much thought into choosing names for their kids, Muslims are simple people.
Muslims are mad all the time, Muslims are mad because they never eat meat, and their women are so ugly. This proves the theory that if you do not eat meat you will be very ugly and mad. I guess they found out years ago that camel meat taste terrible. Camels like to spit on Mohammed. Usually the only bath Mohammed gets is the camel spit. Mohammed has his towel handy to dry off with, so the towel on his head is extremely practical.
Mohammed dislikes Christians and Jews, they are constantly thinking up ways to do away with Christians & Jews. A really dumb Muslim even had a bomb in his shoe that he was going to blow up an airplane with, but dumb Mohammed forgot to put a fuse to the bomb, he mistakenly put the flame to his toe which caused him to scream in agony, security arrested him, he is now serving life in jail and working on a terrorist bible.
As can be seen besides all the other problems they have they are also extremely dimwitted and uncreative. Muslim women are also very ugly, they are so ugly that they wear this sheet over their head, kind of like KKK; this is good because Christians are spared from looking at them. It is not good for banks and quick stops. A trend that is catching on in the urban neighborhoods is to don a black sheet and rob the quick stop or hold up the bank. A sharp eyed cop can discern the discrepancy though because the thief makes the get-away in a car instead of a camel.
Muslims lie about everything and anything, therefore their society is in disarrays, because Mohammed lies and he can’t be trusted. The Koran teaches them to lie, cheat and steal. Never believe anything a Muslims says; come to think of it never believe anything a politician says, politicians and Muslims have much in common.
Muslims make pretty good terrorist, and all terrorist are Muslims. This makes it very easy for the authorities to locate the terrorist, just look for the guy on the camel with the rag on his head. Christians could wipe out Mohammed the terrorist relatively easy, just ask the Japanese, Christians have much technology at their disposal, B-52’s for carpet bombing and nuclear submarines to name a couple, but Christians like to toy with Mohammed for entertainment purposes, What would Fox & CNN news do if they didn’t have Mohammed to kick around? Some Christians think a Stadium; modeled along the lines of the one the Roman Empire had would be a nice addition to the NYC Skyline. The Romans shut it down because they had run out of lions and dark skinned people to slaughter.
Ahab the Arab is Mohammed’s favorite song.
Mohammed steers clear of China though; Chinese have a very low tolerance for Muslims, its shoot on sight there. Chinese obviously have a less developed sense of humor than Christians.
Muslims don’t work because no employer can pay them to take time off to pray 5 times a day, very little work would get done, just like the AFofLCIO union. Knee pads are a big seller for Mohammed the merchant. Besides Muslims have very few if any skills, they can however blow themselves up and they do it quit often, proves my point.
Muslims believe that they will have 54 virgins waiting in heaven, they also believe they will be pretty western girls, this makes them anxious to strap on the bomb belt that they all have in the tent, and go to a market somewhere. Christians on the other hand like to fly at 10,000 feet and blow things up or launch from a ship or sub.
Muslims do a lot of breeding, 8-12 kids is about average, thing is they can’t feed all these kids, so they raise them to blow themselves up. Christians wonder how you could have sex with such an ugly woman. The kids are just as ugly as the parents except they don’t have facial hair. A very sad sight to see kids that ugly, you wish for them to grow up fast so they can cover up with that strange looking sheet that the old Muslim women wear.
Muslims know a few English words even, their favorite is Racist, using this word alone makes an instant ally of liberals. Liberals & Muslims have one thing in common, they both hate Christians. IF the police happen to pull Mohammad over for violation of traffic laws, like riding a camel on the street, the first word out of Mohammad’s mouth is racist or profiling. If you want to have some fun with Mohammed casually mention Christian Crusaders, then sit back and watch the fireworks. Mohammed straps on his bomb belt and evaporates, best to get back a few feet to avoid injury. The first Mohammad, the Muslim that founded this so called religion, took a 12 year old wife, and had many other wives’s. How smart can you be if you want all these ugly woman around you all the time? Muslims offspring’s have an 85% chance of being female, so Mohammed has plenty of butt-ugly women. All Muslim women are rarely seen, and no one seems to know what common name the women use, I have done extensive research and I don’t have an answer for that one. Muslims tear things down, and blow things up as best they can with their limited resources. Christians build great buildings and great warships. It is possible for Mohammed to learn to steer a plane, trouble comes when they remember that they can not land the plane, something they should have though of before they took off, a good landing for a Muslim is to run into some sort of building. All Muslim landing are what we in the west call “Crash Landings”. Muslims cheer crash landings, especially if Mohammed is lucky enough to have found a building to crash into. They can be observed in the middle east dancing in the street and chanting, after such a “landing”. Just imagine how ecstatic they would be if one actually managed to land on a landing strip. Muslims have no F-16 or great ships like the USS Reagan. Muslims have a camel, lots of ugly women and a poor diet and very little else.